Mothers never give up teaching

Have you ever wondered how many things you’ve learnt from your mother? They teach us everything we need to know:
  1. My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A WELL DONE JOB.
    “If you’re going to kill each other, do it outside. I just finished cleaning.”
  2. My mother taught me RELIGION.
    “You better pray that stain come out of the carpet.”
  3. My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL.
    “If you don’t straighten up, I’m going to knock you into the middle of next week!”
  4. My mother taught me LOGIC.
    “Because I said so, that’s why.”
  5. My mother taught me MORE LOGIC.
    “What’s for lunch, mom? – Food!”
  6. My mother taught me IRONY.
    “Keep crying, and I’ll give you something to cry about.”
  7. My mother taught me about THE SCIENCE OF OSMOSIS.
    “Shut your mouth and eat your supper.”
  8. My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM.
    “Look at that dirt on the back of your neck!”
  9. My mother taught me about STAMINA.
    “You’ll sit there until all that spinach is gone.”
  10. My mother taught me about WEATHER.
    “This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it.”
  11. My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY.
    “I’ve told you a million times. Don’t exaggerate!”
  12. My mother taught me the CIRCLE OF LIFE.
    “I brought you into this world, and I can take you out.”
  13. My mother taught me about BEHAVIOUR MODIFICATION.
    “Stop acting like your father!”
  14. My mother taught me MEDICAL SCIENCE.
    “If you don’t stop crossing your eyes, they are going to freeze that way.”
  15. My mother taught me ESP (ExtraSensory Perception).
    “Put your sweater on; don’t you think I know when you are cold?”
  16. My mother taught me BLACK HUMOUR.
    “When that lawn mower cuts off your toes, don’t come running to me.”
  17. My mother taught me WISDOM OF AGE.
    “When you get to be my age, you’ll understand.”
  18. My mother taught me VENTRILOQUISM.
    “Stop grumbling, shut up and answer me: why did you do it?”
  19. My mother taught me TO BE THRIFTY.
    “Save up your tears for my funeral!”
  20. And my mother taught me about JUSTICE.
    “One day you’ll have kids, and I hope they turn out just like you!”

As time goes by, we see our mothers in different ways: The images of mother.

Thanks to all the anonymous authors of these sentences for their sense of humour.

And remember that mother, there is only one, so don’t forget yours!

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